Wonders Never Cease - "7 Wonders: Duel"

Greetings, Exalted Ones!

I always get asked "What's a good game for two people?" Now some game snobs might turn up their nose as such a question and claim that there's no such animal, but I think that's patently ridiculous. Chess, Space Hulk, BattleLore and most of my all-time favorite war games are only for two people.

In fact, there's a ton of great options, including games that either scale down well for two, like Splendor, or games that are specifically designed for a tandem, like Lost Cities. And since I tend to steer away from games that you have to tweak heavily in order to get them to work for two people, my preference is to recommend games specifically engineered for a duo.

One of the best new examples of the latter is 7 Wonders: Duel. 

Before I present a detailed play-through of the game, here's some background info right from the realm-rulers at Repos Production, first in the form of a super-slick promotional vid:

And then via this synopsis on Board Game Geek:

"In many ways 7 Wonders: Duel resembles its parent game 7 Wonders as over three ages players acquire cards that provide resources or advance their military or scientific development in order to develop a civilization and complete wonders.

"What's different about 7 Wonders: Duel is that, as the title suggests, the game is solely for two players, with the players not drafting card simultaneously from hands of cards, but from a display of face-down and face-up cards arranged at the start of a round. A player can take a card only if it's not covered by any others, so timing comes into play as well as bonus moves that allow you to take a second card immediately. As in the original game, each card that you acquire can be built, discarded for coins, or used to construct a wonder.

"Each player starts with four wonder cards, and the construction of a wonder provides its owner with a special ability. Only seven wonders can be built, though, so one player will end up short.

"Players can purchase resources at any time from the bank, or they can gain cards during the game that provide them with resources for future building; as you acquire resources, the cost for those particular resources increases for your opponent, representing your dominance in this area.

"A player can win 7 Wonders: Duel in one of three ways. Each time that you acquire a military card, you advance the military marker toward your opponent's capital, giving you a bonus at certain positions. If you reach the opponent's capital, you win the game immediately. Similarly, if you acquire any six of seven different scientific symbols, you achieve scientific dominance and win immediately. If neither of these situations occurs, then the player with the most points at the end of the game wins."

Looking for the full rule of the law? Then click on the following link to gain the knowledge of the ancients!   

***

So here's how a typical game can shake out:

Age One

From the initial spread of options, player one Mark takes a free Clay Pool while player two Cleo selects a free Quarry. This, in turn, reveals the Baths.

Mark then opts for the free Garrison, which moves the Conflict Pawn one space in Cleo's direction. Cleo responds by taking a free Bath.

Mark then snatches up the Tavern which gives him a tidy l'il windfall of four free Coins. This reveals the Wood Reserve which Cleo is quick to procure for three Coins. In turn, the Workshop is flipped over.

In order to buy the Workshop, Mark is forced to do a Trade action. Since Cleo has no Buildings that produce Papyrus it only costs him a whopping two Coins. Cleo then decides to burn the Pharmacist to gain three Coins, getting the additional one thanks to her Wood Reserve.

Next up Mark snags the Theater fo' free. With the Stable, the Altar and the Guard Tower all now revealed as options, Cleo sinks one Coin into her Wood Reserve to gain the lumber required to buy the Stable. This moves the Conflict Pawn one space back towards the middle of the board.

On Mark's turn he decides to buy the Clay Reserve for three Gold. This, in turn, reveals the Logging Camp which Cleo promptly snaps up for a whole one Coin.

Next up Mark nabs the Guard Tower for free, which nudges the Conflict Token one space in Cleo's direction. On Cleo's turn she's itchin' to build the Piraeus Wonder. One of the required Wood comes from the Logging Camp but then she has to spend one Coin to get the second from her Wood Reserve. The Stone she needs is mined directly from her Quarry. Now she just needs one Brick, so she pays three more Coins to the bank, the additional +1 cost due to Mark's Brick- producing Clay Pool. The final construction step is burying a card in the sequence, so she burns the Altar and promptly takes another turn! Knowing that Mark really needs Papyrus, she callously discards the Press right in front of him for three Gold!

Since Mark's opponent doesn't have any Glass-producing structures yet, he only needs to spend two Coins to get the one Glass required to buy the Apothecary. This reveals the Palisade and the Clay Pit. In response, Cleo pays one Coin to pick up the Pit.

Mark battles back, picking up the sorely-needed Lumber Yard for free. This frees up Cleo to purchase the Palisade for two Coins, which, yet again, swings that Conflict Token pendulum right back to the middle of the Game Board.

In the final play of the Age, Mark nabs the Scriptorium for two Coins! With that requisition, he's half-way to a Scientific victory!

Age Two

 
Normally the player with the weakest Military chooses who begins the next Age but since this a dead heat, the last active player, I.E. whoever played the last card of the previous Age picks who goes first. That's Mark, so he picks himself to start! Problem is: he can't afford anything right now so he burns the Walls for four Coins (with a +2 bonus coming from his Clay Reserve and Tavern). This reveals the Laboratory. Cleo is also poor as a church mouse and must make a big decision: dump the Customs House which makes Glass and Papyrus cheaper or the Laboratory which would give Mark a Progress Token. She decides the turf the latter for three Coins, enjoying a +1 bonus thanks to the Wood Reserve.

It comes back to Mark and he blows the four Coins required to pick up the Customs House. This reveals two news cards: the Archery Range and the Parade Ground. Cleo already has one Brick and one Wood for the latter so she pays a measly two Coins for the Papyrus since Mark has no matching Buildings. This gets her the Archery Range, which shifts the Conflict Token back two spaces in Mark's direction.

To prevent losing Coins to Cleo's surging Military, Mark spends one Coin to get a Papyrus from his Customs House and one Coin to get a Clay from his Clay Reserve. Coupled with the Brick from his Clay Pool, he buys the Parade Ground, which shifts the Conflict Token back to neutral ground. Cleo then burns the Library to keep it away from Mark and to generate three Coins for herself.

Mark responds by picking up the Drying Room for free. This reveals two new cards: the Barracks and the Forum. Cleo then uses the prerequisite Water symbol on the Baths to acquire the Aqueduct for the low, low price of zero! This flips over the Statue.

Mark can't resist picking it up the Statue since it's free thanks to the Theater . Eventually, though, he's going to have to generate some Coinage. Cleo replies by spending three Coins and a Brick from the Clay Pit to pick up the Forum.

Mark fires back by roasting the Rostrum for five Coins. This reveals the Glass-Blower and the Dispensary. Cleo responds by building the awesome Circus Maximus, getting one free Glass from the Forum, Wood from the Logging Camp, one Stone from the Quarry and buying the last Stone at the discount rate of two Coins, since Mark has nothing that produces Stone. To add insult to injury, she buries the School underneath it to keep it out of Mark's hands. The Circus lets her destroy one of Mark's Brown or Gray cards, so she goes after the Drying Room. It also shifts the Conflict Token one space in Mark's direction.

Mark decides that its time to start fighting back. He overpays for the Temple of Artemis by spending two Coins to wring one Glass and one Papyrus out of the Customs House. The Wood comes from the Lumber Yard but then he has to pay three Coin for the required Stone, the cost of which is inflated by one "thanks" to Cleo's Stone-producing Quarry. Of course, a card has to be sacrificed to complete the building process so Mark turfs the Glass-Blower. For constructing the Temple, he gets a whopping twelve Coins back and can now take a free turn. He snatches up the Barracks for free which, once again, pushes the Conflict Token back towards the middle of the Board. Cleo responds by picking up the incredibly-versatile Caravansary with two Coins, the required Glass coming from her Forum and the Papyrus coming from a two-Coin trade back to the bank.

Given all the Coinage that Mark just picked up, it makes sense for him to build The Great Lighthouse. The Wood comes from the Lumber Yard but he still has to pay three Coins for the Brick and two Coins to his Customs House to get two Papyrus. Mark then burns the Sawmill to bring this tremendous Wonder into being. Cleo then realizes that, thanks to the Logging Camp, the Caravansary and the Forum, the Courthouse is stone-cold free for her and worth a respectable five Victory Points.

With valuable resources coming from both the Great Lighthouse and his Clay Pool, Mark gets the Dispensary for free. Once again, Cleo is destitute so she plays keep-away with the Shelf Quarry and picks up five Coins.

Mark then spends one Coin to generate Papyrus from his Customs House to snag the Temple.

Age Three

Once again the Military is in prefect equilibrium so Mark decides to play play first and erect a Statue of Zeus. With nearly everything provided by The Great Lighthouse, all he has to do is pay two Coins to produce the required Papyrus via the Customs House. He buries the Magistrates Guild to complete this Wonder, destroys Cleo's Clay Pit and then shift the Conflict Token one space in her direction. This, in turn, reveals an Obelisk. Cleo immediately picks this new monument up for free, with the Stone coming from the Caravansary and the Quarry and the Glass coming from the Forum. 

Next up Mark snags the Pantheon for free since he has the prerequisite Sun symbol on the Temple. This reveals the Observatory and the Siege Workshop. Cleo goes after the Appian Way, which requires one Papyrus (from the Forum), two Brick (one from the Caravansary and three back to the bank), and two Stone, one of which comes from the Quarry and the other in Trade for two more Coins. To polish it off she torches the Observatory. This produces several immediate effects: Cleo collects three Coins from the Bank, Mark loses three and she takes another turn! Using the prerequisite Target icon on the Archery Range she picks up the Siege Workshop for free, which, in turn, moves the Conflict Token two spaces right back at Mark.

On Mark's next turn he picks up a complimentary Lighthouse, thanks to the Jug symbol on the Tavern. That puts four more Coins right back into his coffers! Meanwhile, Cleo picks up the Palace, with the two Glass coming from the Piraeus and the Forum, the Wood from the Logging camp, the Stone from the Quarry and Brick coming from the Caravansary.

This flips over the Arena, which Mark gets for free thanks to the Great Lighthouse. This also generates a whopping six more Coins for him, two for each Wonder! Cleo then goes after the Tacticians Guild, getting the two Stone from the Caravansary and the Quarry, one Brick for three Coins from the Bank, and the Papyrus from the Forum. This nets her a nice four-coin windfall as well!

Thanks to his Scrooge McDuck pile of Coins, Mark builds his last Wonder, the Pyramids. One Stone gets quarried from the Great Lighthouse, but he has to pay six Coin in total for the other two. He then parleys one Coin into a Papyrus via the Customs House. The last construction step is to discard an available Building so he chooses the Town Hall. With the titular 7'th Wonder constructed, Cleo has lost her chance to build the Colossus. As a consolation prize, she jumps all over the Builder's Guild, spending two Coin to get a Stone and mining the second from the Quarry. The Brick she needs for this purchase comes from the Caravansary with the Wood from the Logging Camp and the Glass from the Forum. This reveals the Chamber of Commerce.

Mark spends two Coins to get two Glass from the Customs House. The Wood and the Brick comes from The Great Lighthouse, which is all he needs to pick up the Academy. This, in turn, unlocks the Port. Cleo uses the Glass from Piraeus, Papyrus from the Forum and Wood from the Logging camp to snatch it up. This nets her two Coin for every Brown Card she owns, I.E. four Coins.

Now its Mark's turn and he's a bit stuck. He really doesn't want the Chamber of Commerce so he burns it for a whopping seven Coin. Unfortunately, this gives Cleo the ability to buy the mega-powerful Circus. To do so she pays one Stone from the Quarry and the other one she gets in Trade for two Coins. One Brick comes from the Caravansary and for the other she's forced to pay three Coin (+1 due to Mark's Clay Pit). This pushes the Conflict token two spaces in Mark's direction, which, in turn, forces him to discard two Coins! This also reveals Fortifications.

To bring balance to the Force, Mark feels compelled to buy that Fort. One Brick and one Stone comes from The Great Lighthouse, but he also has to spend one Coin to get Papyrus from his Customs House and three Coin to get the other Stone (+1 due to Clea's Quarry). This edges the Conflict Token back two spaces towards the center of the board. Knowing that if Mark nabs that University he'll win the game, Cleo gets a Brick from the Caravansary, one Glass from the Forum and one Papyrus from the Piraeus to play keep-away. This, in turn, brings up the Praetorium.

Mark doesn't have the eight Coins needed to build the Praetorium so he burns it for a whopping seven Coins! Cleo, just to be evil, decides to snatch up the Gardens, knowing that Mark can get it for free. She gets one Brick from the Caravansary, pays three Coins for the second Brick (+1 due to Mark's Clay Pit) gets one Wood from her Logging Camp and then pays one Coin to get the last Wood from the Wood Reserve.

In the last move of the game, Mark makes like Koch brothers and buys the Senate. One Brick comes from his Clay Pit, the other comes from his Great Lighthouse, which also provides the Stone. He then pays one Coin to the Custom House to get the final ingredient: Papyrus.

FINAL SCORING

Military

Mark...0 Cleo...2

Blue Buildings

Mark...22  Cleo...31

Green Buildings

Mark...7 Cleo...2

Yellow Buildings

Mark...6  Cleo...3

Purple Buildings

Mark...0 Cleo...13 (8 Points for the Builders Guild and 5 points for the Tacticians Guild)

Wonders

Mark...16 Cleo...8

Progress

Mark...0  Cleo...0

Treasury

Mark...12 /3 = 4  Cleo...10/3=3

Final Totals

  Mark: 0 (Military) + 22 (Blue Buildings) + 7 (Green Buildings) + 6 (Yellow Buildings) + 0 (Purple) + 16

(Wonders) + 0 (Progress) + 4 (Treasury) =  55

Cleo: 2 (Military) + 31 (Blue Buildings) + 2 (Green Buildings) + 3 (Yellow Buildings) + 13 (Purple Buildings) + 8 (Wonders) + 0 (Progress) + 3 (Treasury)  = 62

Cleo wins!

***

Review

Pros 

• I like how the difficulty scales up during the three Ages. In other words, after skimming the rules you can pretty just right into the first Age. Then, when more complicated options pop up, you can just pause the game, look up the appropriate iconography and then jump right back into the action. It's like a form of in-game programmed learning. 
• Since Military or Scientific Victories are a constant threat, you have to be vigilant at all times. Handing your opponent one of these wins is like dropping a game of Tic-Tac-Toe. 
• The ability to burn cards to generate Coins and turf things to construct Wonders is a major part of the strategy. I.E. you have to pay a lot of attention to avoid handing your opponent a big play on a silver platter.
• Since half the cards are face up, your encouraged to ponder future strategies. Conversely when unexpected cards pop up, you're forced to think on your feet.
• I like how the cost of resources is based on your opponent's holdings. Not only does this simulate inflation rather nicely, it could, in theory, make certain resources almost cost prohibitive in some games. In the above example both players didn't have a lot of gray and brown Resource Cards and this kept the Trade rates relatively low, but I can see the next game being completely different. This sort of variance certainly bodes well for game re-playability. 
• Timing is critical! Its great to get first dibs on newly-flipped cards and the timely construction of a Wonder can also be a tremendous boon. Not only do these things give you some handy windfalls and / or permanent resources, some even give you the chance to take another turn. Time this perfectly and you can go on a mini-run that advances your strategy or shuts your opponent down cold. 
• I like how the winner is always in doubt until the final score tally. I love how the Guilds and the Progress tokens make the scores just "swingy" enough to let someone come from behind.
• The cards, the Coins, the Game Board and the Conflict Token are all top-notice. The art is also quite nice. 
• Thematically, it does kinda feel as if you're developing an increasingly-sophisticated civilization. 

 Cons

• Not much, actually. Some of the iconography is a challenge to memorize and you may find yourself reaching for the Help Sheet quite often at first. Plus the whole "player who chooses who goes first in the next Age is the last active player" rule seems a bit odd at face value, but clearly it didn't have a massive impact on the sample game above.

7 Wonders: Duel shocked the heck outta me, especially when you consider that I'm lukewarm at best on its parent game, which I especially dread with a full compliment of players. In a refreshing twist, this two-player version is short, sweet, and surprisingly nuanced.

As such 7 Wonders: Duel scores five pips outta six with a tilt up into the lingering and slightly awkward gaze of the Colossus of Rhodes!

  ***   

Wanna fiddle while your opponent's city burns? Then click on the following link to learn more about 7 Wonders: Duels and help this blog become the stuff of legend!

♫ ♬ "(Gaming) Memories...In The Corner Of My Mind" ♩♪

So, as you read this you'll probably be wondering...why is he writing about a game day that happened waaaaay back in September of 2015?

Welp, five reasons, offa the top o' my head:

1. My regular weekly gaming group really isn't an option for me anymore so I'll be dipping back into the archives more and more.
2. To ensure that I don't freeze and / or starve to death during the winter (and can finance a new vehicle that won't fly apart on the highway when it exceeds 60 kilometers per hour) I've been forced to take on more paying work, leaving me less and less time to game and write. And write about games. Such is "life" I guess. 
3. I always like to be reminded of a time when the world around me wasn't a cold, damp monochromatic hellscape.
4. I actually played some really fun games that day that are worth talking about. 
5. I want to give youze guys some tips for teaching these games to your own friends. 

This was actually the third annual "Quadruple B": I.E. the "Brother's Booze BBQ and Boardgames" event, which happened back on September 12'th 2015. Mark and Dawn were kind enough to throw their homes open to us yahoos for another full day of gamin', drinkin' and wantonly carnivorous behavior. 

As one of the resident "game masters" (I'm getting some business cards done up as we speak) I decided to kick things off with something lite: namely Click Clack Lumberjack, which I first spotlighted on the blog right hur.

Basically, the players are lumberjacks who are trying to strip the bark off of a tree without harming the core of the tree. I know, I know, that makes about as much sense as Willow flaying Warren alive in Buffy and then expecting him to be the Big Bad in Season Seven, but, hey, whatevs.

During their turn, players take two whacks at the plastic tree with their l'il plastic axe. Every piece of bark they strip off the tree is one point to the good. If the bark they just knocked off has a l'il grub sticker underneath it, that's worth another point, plus it gives you a free chop.

If you fuck up royal and shear a piece of the white core offa the tree then that's bad. Like real bad. Like "minus five points to your score" kinda bad.

Anyway I had a blast watching Cheryl, Sabina, Allison, Mark and Trevor cope with this one. Eventually people start to marvel at the tree's gravity-defying contortions. Mid-way through the game, the thing looks like a pine tree that's been "out on the bank" for the past one-hundred years.

In the end, Alllicene proved to be the most deft of hand. Here are the final scores:

Cheryl: -4

Me: -3

Sabina: -2

Mark: 0

Trevor: +3

Allicenne: +6

Everyone seemed to dig this one so I quickly re-racked it for another game. I get a kick out of watching folks discover sneaky tactics like cherry-picking pieces that are on the verge of falling off, using a flick action to knock back off the top tier or deliberately knocking the whole thing outta whack just to fuck with the next person. Good times.

Our overall score in game two was slightly better and my more-conservative strategy let me eke out a tie. Here, then, are the final scores from game two:

Sabina: -3

Mark: -2

Cheryl: +3

Me, Trevor & Allicenne: +4

Sorry, but I love this stupid game. It's a wonderful opener and / or a great wind-down closer at the end of the night. It's cat-nip for non-gamers and kids in particular. In a world where Jenga is the only dexterity game that people know of, this one is Campaign for North Africa in comparison.

Pro tip: I've house-ruled the "grub" rule ever so slightly. In the original game if you reveal a grub you get a free full two-whack turn but that's totes cray-cray IMHO, especially if you turn up several of them at once. So, in my games, I just limit it to a single bonus strike.

Next up was Dead Man's Draw, which I originally profiled right hur.

Dead Man's Draw is a press-your-luck pirate-themed card game. On a player's turn, they draw the top card on the deck and play it in their "run". There are ten different suits in the game and each card is numbered from two to nine. Each time a card hits the table it triggers a special ability that you can use to help your effort or screw around with your opponents.

Anytime you want to stop drawing cards you can. Cards you collect at the end of your turn are placed in a chest of "booty" in front of you, stacked in different suits with the highest value on top. Alternately, you can keep drawing cards as long as you want but as soon as you draw a suit that's already in your "run" you bust and all of your cards go into the discard pile. Bee-boo.

The game continues until the draw pile is exhausted. Players then count up the top deck value in each of their suit stacks and the highest total value wins the game.

This is another one that's a blast to teach to people. I'm so good at it now that I don't have to do any up-front rules dump, I just get the first player to draw their first card and I talk them through their options. The most important thing to communicate to them right off the bat is that, with ten different suits, your really start to flirt with the possibility of busting when you get up around three or four draws.

Here's how the score rattled out in this one:

Allicenne...16 points

Trevor...35 points

Me...48 points

Cheryl...60 points    

The same group stuck around for game two. Trevor and Allicenne proved to be quick studies and dominated the game. Here are the final scores:

Cheryl...34 points

Me & Allicenne...50 points

Trevor...57 points

Some tips about teaching this one to people: feel free to explain what the cards do and how they work in tandem, but always let your players discover the combos themselves. It's particularly gratifying when they figure out some crazy, Machiavellian plan all by themselves. "Hmmm, a Treasure Map. Let's see, if I use the Hook I just turned up to drag that Sword back into my run, I can steal your Key and complete my Chest / Key combo! Yis!"

Indeed, the best part of the game is discovering the synergy amongst different suits which you can use to rack up mondo points. It's not the deepest game in the world, but its another good, light, portable opener that makes your brain percolate.

Next up was Roll For It! which I've also previously covered here and here.

This one is a super-lite, odds-making, Vegas-style dice game. To start things off, three cards are randomly flipped up on the table from the top of the deck. Each one is a "blueprint" you're trying to fulfill with your six dice. The more dice required, the more it's worth.

On your turn you roll all six of your dice and dock 'em anywhere you like. Vis a vis you can split 'em up amongst several card, and that's a big part of the strategy. Do go all in on one card or hedge my bet among several and roll less dice?

Here, I'll give you an example. Say you've got a five-pointer on the table requiring three "3"s, just like in the photo below. On my first turn I roll two "3's" so I plop 'em next to that card. But then, my jack-hole opponent comes along and rolls three "3"s in one go. They can snipe my card, bump my dice back to me, and now they're well on their way to the 40 points needed to win.

Right off the bat I took the lead by going after some quick, low-value cards. Trevor scored a big 10 points but every time he started to invest in a new card, someone would just steal it away from him! Eventually he became obsessed with completing a juicy 15 pointer but this caused him to stall completely. Both Cheryl and Allicenne both tried to take a run at me but by then all I needed was another easily-acquired ten-pointer to put me over the top.

Final Scores

Trevor...10 Points

Allicenne...30 Points

Cheryl...37 Points

Me...41 Points

Whereas Click Clack Lumberjack is catnip for kids, Roll For It! is catnip for parents. It's quick, super-easy to teach and, hey, everybody loves dice! Just remember the following three important things when teaching the game to people:

1. Sometimes players will make the mistake of splitting their dice up while going for a 15-pointer. Be sure to remind them that they need all six dice on that one card in order to claim it. 
2. Get players to temporarily set aside any dice they just used to buy a card and then turn up a new card from the top of the deck. This gives the player a chance to allocate any of their remaining, unspent dice. In fact, with a particularly lucky roll, you can actually pick up several cards in one turn. Be sure to remind players that they'll get all of the dice they set aside back at the start of their next turn.
3. If players opt to take their dice back they can't cherry pick just some of them. They have to take all of them back but then they get to roll all six again. 

Next up we decided to play one of the better party games to come down the pike in a while: Konito?.  
To set things up, you construct a "race track" with a bunch of brightly-colored puzzle pieces. This alone is awesome enough since you can use all of the pieces for a 30-40 minute game or just half or three-quarters of the pieces for a shorter 20-minute game.

After everyone is divided up into teams, get them to pick a colored token and place it on the start space. Choose a team at random to start and then elect one member to be the first phrase-reader. An example of a phrase might be:

"May The Force __ ____ ___." 

Now if you've been living underneath a rock since 1977 and you had no idea what I was taking about talking about, I can then launch into word-association, songs, gestures...anything to get my team-mates to finish the phrase. Green spaces have three phrases per card, the orange spaces have four and the red spaces are the most challenging with five phrases per card. Each card your team clears in the allotted time is a movement point for your token around the race track.

Oh, one final thing: if you start your turn on a "Konito?" space the phrase-reader begins by drawing the top "Konito?" card and asking their team-mates "Do you wanna do 1, 2 or 3?". The random number they settle on corresponds to a particular stunt that your team must now accommodate for the upcoming turn. An example of this would be: "After each response, the answerer must give their first and last name". Typically these challenges make things slightly harder but also offer some sort of rewards if you succeed.

The first team token to reach the end of the track wins! 

The Teams

Team Blue: Angie, Cheryl and Allicenne

Team Black: Me, Chad and Trevor

Team Green: Angela, Claudia and Sabina

Since this was our first game, and a lot of the stunts are kinda humiliating, we decided to play 'em. As the game began we were getting our asses kicked. Angela, Claudia and Sabina were working in perfect tandem with one another. But eventually we started to settle down and close the gap by deliberately landing on the easier green spaces. Eventually Team Green got hung up on a tough Red spot just one space away from the finish line!

With Chad up, Trevor blew through the phrases as quick as possible and Chad's responses were unerring. So, right at the very end, we blasted by our rivals to claim the win!

This was one of my first times teaching the game to people so I goofed up one critical rule: everyone on the phrase-reader's team can answer. We were playing it so that the phrase reader and answerer kept changing and only one person could answer that round. This put people on the spot and made it a lot harder.

I.E. I can't slight the game for my grievous fuck-up. It's actually one of the better party games I've played in recent memory but, then again, I'm also a weirdo English major and writer who loves phrases. Full disclosure: I've taught the game to a lot of people and I've noticed that, for some strange reason, some Millennials have no sweet clue what a lot of these phrases are. So be sure to divide younger players evenly amongst the teams to make things are fair as possible.

Next up: one of my favorite press-your-luck dice games: Pickomino by Reiner "I Loves Me Some Numbers" Knizia.

In Pickomino (originally titled Heck Meck) players are mama hens trying to bring back as many tasty barbecued worms for their chicks to eat. They do so by rolling eight dice and keeping one matching set. For example, if my first throw was two "2's",  two "1's", three "4's" and one Worm symbol I could keep the three "4's" for 12 points. Now, I'm gonna hafta roll again 'cuz the lowest valued tile on the table is 21.

So I go again, and this time I throw one "1",  one "3",  four "4's" and two Worm symbols. Unfortunately I can't take the four "4's" 'cuz I kept 'em on a previous throw. But I can take the two Worms, which is a good idea for two reasons: they're worth five points a pop and I need at least one of 'em sitting in front of me by the time I stop. So I decide to take 'em and now I'm up to 22 points.

Now I can stop right there, take the "22" tile with a single worm on it and then pass the dice on to the next person. Every time I stop and keep a tile it goes on top of my stack. This gives the game another interesting wrinkle: if you roll the exact number on the top of someone's stack you can steal that tile away from them. Zing!

I can also keep rolling as often as I want, but if I can't keep a die result that's different from my previous throws I bust, my top tile goes back into the sequence and I flip over the highest valued tile on the table. This ensures that the the game lasts no longer than a half hour. The game ends when all the tiles are passed around and / or flipped and the highest worm count wins the game.

I introduced this one to Allicenne as well as Dawn's two friends Paula and Rhonda. Everybody picked up on it right away and pretty soon we were all rollin' as if our chick's lives depended on it. Right from the start I settled for a lot of low valued tiles but Paula proved to be particularly adept at pressing her luck. Instead of chickening out (seewutididthur?) she persevered and kept rolling long after logic (and sanity) dictated that she should stop. For me, such gambits never seem to pan out, but for her it really paid off.

Final Scores

Rhonda...0 Points

Allicenne...1 Point

Me...6 Points

Paula...8 Points

Game two played out in a similar fashion with me sniping the lowest valued tiles. This time it was Rhonda's turn to snap up those scrumptious high-worm tiles. I also suffered a bit from "game master" syndrome which dictates that if someone's gonna get a tile stolen from them, it's gonna be the guy who taught the game to people. Clearly he's the greatest threat! Yeah, um, no.

Here's how the scores shook out for game two:

Me...0 points

Allicenne and Paula...3 Points

Rhonda...4 Points

No matter how well you "elevator pitch" Pickomino to people, they'll typically just stand there and blink at you. So now I just throw it down on the table and tell people "YOU ARE PLAYING THIS GAME RITE NOW" in my best Dr. Klaw voice. Once it's down and people start chuckin' dem bones, they can't stop. It's like the "potato chip" of dice games, you just can't play one!

Next up: the smash-hit party game of 2015: Codenames.

Leave it to wonderkind designer Vlaada Chvátil to take a simple word-association party game like Catch Phrase and turn it into a super-cool spy-themed game.

Before I get started I just wanna say up front that the optimal number of players here is either four or six but it still technically works with three or two (kinda) or seven plus (decreasingly so). The game play itself is deceptively easy: players split into red and blue teams and nominate a "Spymaster" as their guide. It's the Spymaster's job to get their color-coded agents to rendezvous with affiliated spies in the field and keep them away from rival agents, the unwitting general populace or, even worse, the deadly Assassin. 

After a random, 5 x 5 grid of "code name" cards is laid out on the table, a "blueprint" is revealed to the Spymasters only. This instantly identifies where your field agents are as well as rival spies, Innocent Bystanders and the Assassin. The Spymasters are then given a moment to look at this grid and try to find as many links between their team cards as possible.

So as not to tip off their rivals with the movement of their agents, the Spymasters will alternate back and forth, giving their team a one-word clue and then a number which indicates how many code name cards they're referring to. For example if I'm the blue Spymaster and the secret blueprint tells me that three of my blue spies in the field are "GOLD", "SHIP" and "PLANK", I might tell them "PIRATE - 3". This tips them off to look for three pirate-related code name cards.

After talking among themselves, a team must eventually settle on a guess by physically pointing to it. Every time they guess right, you get to overlay one of your color-coded Agent tiles. If they get all of their guesses right, they can press their luck by taking take one more bonus guess, perhaps based on a previous clue they've been given.

If they screw up and pick a rival team's color, the enemy team gets to drop one of their team color tiles on the board and the turn immediately passes to them. If you send an agent to meet with an Innocent Bystander, then a neutral cards hits the table and your turn is over. But the worst case scenario is sending your agents to meet with the deadly Assassin. If that happens you immediately lose the game and the other team wins. In other words, if I didn't notice that "ISLAND" was the Assassin in the example above, I've just put my players in genuine peril with my PIRATE-themed clue! 
    

Game One Teams

Red Team

Spymaster: Me

Agents: Jeremy and Trevor

Blue Team

Spymaster: Andrew

Agents: Cheryl and Matt

Even though I'm usually the dude who comes in last on our first play of deep Eurogames, but I'm a real savant when it comes to Codenames. Sometimes you'll get lucky and there'll be plenty of blatant links between some of the cards, but in most instances, you really have to think creatively. Sure, you can give a clue linked to a single card, but that isn't going to get you ahead! You gotta gamble a bit by doling out clever clues that relate to two, three, even four or more code name cards at a time.

Things were still pretty close mid-way through our first game but then Andrew got a little gun shy. Even though some of the links were tenuous at best, I managed to press my luck and us nudge into the lead. This gave me a chance to deliver the coup de grâce in the form of a conservative one-word clue: "MacDonald" for "BRIDGE", which probably only makes sense if you're from Halifax.  

Winners: Me, Jeremy and Trevor.

Game Two Teams

Red Team

Spymaster: Jeremy

Agents: Me and Trevor

Blue Team

Spymaster: Matt

Agents: Cheryl and Andrew

No offense to Jeremy but some of his clues, such as the incredibly esoteric "ANGELES" (as is LOS Angeles), put us behind the eight-ball pretty quick. Conversely, Matt was laser-focused, bangin' out one 2 to 3-word clue after another. As such, Team Blue trounced us soundly by a score of 8 - 5.

Winners: Matt, Cheryl and Andrew.

Things were starting to wind down by then, with many of the remaining party-goers distracted by some sort of DVD party game that I had zero interest in. This gave Andrew, Cheryl, Matt and I a chance to bust out one of my favorites from last year: Splendor.

Since I've already talked about this one pretty extensively (namely here, here, here and here) I'm not going to re-hash it in any detail. I do want to preface the following account by telling you that Andrew had just come off a Splendor tournament. He's prepared for this by weight-training with the app so much that he claimed to be invincible. Naturally we took this as a challenge and Cheryl, Matt and myself promptly took up the gauntlet against him.

Unfortunately, Andrew's prediction proved prescient and he charted an incredibly streamlined path through the game. I did a reasonably good job picking up some Prestige but my choices were considerably less optimal. For the record, my Splendor skills have really improved since this last meeting and now I think I could really give him a run for his money.

Matt, sharp cookie that he is, grasped the rules very quickly but by the time he started to divine a clear strategy it was already too late. Cheryl, normally a super-sharp contender in Splendor, Cheryl spent way too long developing her base before collecting any Prestige Points, which, as we know, is what the game's all about! 

Final Scores

Cheryl...2 Points

Matt...4 Points

Me...9 Points

Andrew...15 Points

I've played Splendor so much now that it's the gaming equivalent of a warm, fluffy robe. It's comforting, cozy and reassuringly simple. I'd like to challenge Andrew once again, this time applying some recent epiphanies about the game which involve the creation of deep discounts for the most plentiful developments while exploiting reservations to the maximum.

Speaking of gaming comfort foods, our last match of the evening was Lords of Waterdeep, which I've already featured here and here. I only had the base game with me, but since it was getting late, I needed something with a quick set up time and fewer options.

This time I was the one on point, snapping up the primo quests, becoming a prolific slumlord and nailing people with irksome Mandatory Quests. Andrew, on the other hand, altered his strategy mid-game, killing his momentum in the process. Meanwhile Cheryl had a hard time picking up quests that dovetailed with her Lord's special ability.

Final Scores

 

Cheryl...131 Points

Andrew...134 Points

Me...142 Points

What can I say about Lords that hasn't already been said? To this day it's still one of my all-time favorite worker placement games. Even though I consider the Scoundrels of Skullport expansion to be de rigueur now every time I play it, there's something to be said about clean, elegant simplicity of the core game as well.

What I like most about Lords of Waterdeep is that it practically begs you to pay attention to the Buildings, the Quest spread and the Intrigue cards. Successful players will be the ones who juggle all of these elements in the most efficient manner.

***

By the time Lords of Waterdeep wrapped up it was around 11:30 pm and we'd been drinkin', gamin' and eating like kings for about eight hours straight. Ergo, it was time to pack it in. We thanked Mark and Dawn extensively for being such great hosts before heading out into the crisp, late-summer air. I drove home very happy, content in the knowledge that I'd presided over a few new gaming epiphanies, especially amongst valued friends.

Pity that my opportunities to game are becoming increasingly scarce. But, fear not! There's hope on the horizon! Stay tuned, folks, I've got a massive entry coming soon featuring a crap-ton of new games, some new reviews on deck, plans for a new video series and some exciting events on the horizon!

***

Wanna impress your friends with some cool, hipster-ish game knowledge? Well, click on any of the images below to learn more about the games we played and keep this blog on fleek!

RPG Review: "Dungeons & Dragons" Fifth Edition Players Handbook

It's hard to believe that the D&D Fifth Edition Players Handbook been out since August of 2014. That's how long I've been trying to do a review of this thing. Wow, I suck.

In retrospect, though, it's good that I've had plenty of time to goof around with this new system. Reviewing an RPG system without playing it is like declaring a scientific theory sound without testing it.

But I credit Fifth Edition for all of the D&D in my life right now. In fact, his you hopped into a time machine and told fourteen-year-old me that he'd be running and / or playing in no less than four different D&D campaigns in the distant future of 2016 he'd laugh politely at the gray-bearded wind-bag and then bolt out of the room.

But there's a sound reason for this. Read on and I'll endeavor to explain why this version of the game might very well be my favorite edition yet.

I've broken things down to chapter-specific notes and observations and I'll polish everything off at the end with some final thoughts. Let's get started, shall we?  

Chapter 1: Step-By-Step Characters

 

My first Fifth Edition D&D character: Braemar "Bugslayer" Barrelhouse, the stout halfling ranger, gone on to some thrilling exploits.

• The Ability Score Summary is a handy, at-a-glance description of what each stat means, what Class it's most handy for and which Races get a perk from it. This is very handy for getting started.  
• A +4 Ability Score Modifier for an 18 brings shades of AD&D's exceptional Strength to mind. 
• I was blown away by how easy it was to get to Level Two. But, then again, if you're lookin' to attract new players with short attention spans I suppose it makes sense to give them a cookie as soon as possible.  

Chapter 2: Races

• Humans get a +1 to every single freakin' Ability Score right across the board, unless they start with the Variant Human Trait which bumps up only two scores but also includes a starting Skill and a Feat. I still have a hard time wrapping my brain around this one since it results in some pretty stacked characters up front, especially in conjunction with the "roll four 6-sided dice and add up the highest three results" rule. I'd be tempted to re-institute the olde skool 3d6 cold roll again if not for the fact that only Humans get this incredible starting boost.
• The Proficiency Bonus incorporates so many oddball modifiers and simulates improving skills so easily.
• Fuck all you haterz I'm happy to see Gnomes back as Player Character. Not only is it oddly reassuring for me to see these guys come back, the new Forest and Rock flavors actually makes them pretty tempting to play. 
• Knowing that Dragonborn and Tieflings were added to Fouth Edition in a blatant attempt to attract  people who want more "badass" characters, I really don't care one way or the other. The bottom line is: I'm not one to bitch about having more options rather than less. 

Chapter 3: Classes

• Well, color me surprised when I discovered that the answer to that age-old adage of "when Barbarians fly" turns out to be "Level 14". Granted its more of a mystical leap but it still seems out of step with what should be a grounded (no pun intended), down-to-earth (pun intended), martial, anti-magic class like Barbarians. 
• Sorry, but Bards still make absolutely no sense to me whatsoever. As a DM it's virtually impossible to describe powers like "Cutting Words" without making the whole thing sound super-deewby. The Colleges improve things marginally, with Lore Bards coming across as a combination of Woodward and Bernstein-style journalists armed with the put-down capabilities of a Louis C.K. or a Bill Burr.
• Mercifully "Turn / Destroy Undead" has been simplified as a Savings Throw. "Channel Divinity" also dovetails nicely with the well-thought-out Domains. Players and DM's can run riot with powers such as "Divine Intervention" and "Object Reading".
• I like that a high Wisdom improves how effective spells are for Druids and Clerics and it also determines how many Spells they can prepare.
• "Wild Form" lets a Druid shape change almost right away and the rules govern these transformations rather elegantly. Also Land Circle Druids have tons of options. I like how their Circle Spells actually fit in with their origins. For example, if you wanna be all claw / claw / bite and less spell-casty go with a Circle of the Moon Druid.
• The varied fighting styles for Fighters are simple and evocative. Martial Archetypes add even more customization options plus loads of complexity. So, if you've played a crap-ton of Fighters in your long and storied adventuring career, you'll love all the new options provided by the Battle Master. On the other hand, newbies will dig the clean simplicity and raw power of the Champion. Abilities such as "Know Your Enemy" really rawk and Superiority Dice / Maneuvers offer a lot of potential for clever application.
• I'll always prefer the original classes best since they have antecedents in real world history and / or classic fantasy yarns. Conversely, the newer classes have a lot more pop culture antecedents and, as such, they come across as cheesy fan service sometimes. For example, whenever I read the Eldridge Knight description I get a GRAVE DISTURBANCE IN THE FORCE. Again, I don't wanna bitch too loud since I just created an Eldritch Knight character that's half Kylo Ren and half Darth Vader as he appears in this classic Eddie Izzard bit. 
• I still maintain that Monks would be more at home in an "Oriental Adventures" campaign. Like the ridiculous concept of airborne Barbarians, powers such as "Shadow Step" nudge these once-martial characters dangerously close to the realm of the silly. As a side note: "Way of the Four Elements" is about as Avatar: The Last Airbender as you can possibly get without a cease and desist order.
• Since they aren't completely shackled by the "Lawful Stupid" alignment anymore, Paladins actually look like they'd be fun to play now. And look at all the different options here! If you go the "Oath of Devotion" route you can play as a Cavalier. "Oath of the Ancients" will give you a "Gawain and the Green Knight" sorta vibe. If you want a Batman / Inigo Montoya angle then take the "Oath of Vengeance" path. Just like many of the other classes, powers such as "Avenging Angel" dip a toe into the crazy pool but at least this doesn't happen until Level 20.
• Rangers can add an additional Favored Enemy, preferably based on their recent run-ins. With that comes improved lore about your mortal enemies and the ability to track them more effectively. "Natural Explorer" creates no less than eight different branching paths. The four fighting styles (Archery, Defense, Dodge and Two-Weapon Fighting) give you four more customization options. In other words, you can start your career as a woodland Archer that hates aberrations or you can be a dual-cutlass-wielding seaside dweller who despises water elementals. Archetypes customize this even further. I know that some of this comes across as "Fouth Edition-y" but it actually works here. All of these features mesh surprisingly well together and, at the very least, gives the DM plenty of inspiration fodder to run cool, descriptive combats. "Escape the Horde", "Multiattack Defense", "Volley" and "Stand Against The Tide" are all a blast to play out in game. Bonus points: "Beast Master" is basically Dar from a certain cheesy 80's fantasy movie of the same name. "Primeval Awareness" is the only Ranger power that feels kinda "airy-fairy" but even that would be cool to see played out during a hex crawl. "Hide in Plain Sight" also has some fun ninja-esque qualities to it.
• The Rogue's "Expertise" makes Thieves Tools a Proficiency so going down the criminal path certainly isn't mandatory. Hey, I'm just an innocent lock-smith, okay? On the other hand, if you wanna go all Oceans 11, then the "Thief" Archetype will have you a-heistin' and a-pilferin' quicker then you can say "YOINK!". Then there's "Fast Hands", which will give your character the sort of deftness that Indiana Jones would be totes jelly of. And words can't describe how happy I am to see the Assassin back in some shape or form. DM's and players alike will have a blast with "Infiltration Expertise" and "Imposter". Unfortunately I think "Death Strike" could be a tad deadlier. "Arcane Trickster" is like "Loki the Character Class". "Mage Hand Legerdemain" could have a lot of interesting applications in the hands of a creative player. "Magical Ambush" looks like fun but "Spell Thief" totally breaks the knob offa the ol' Batshit-Insane-O-Meter. 
• I like how the Sorcerer's "Flexible Casting" hints at fluctuating and unpredictable sources of power. A Sorcerer doesn't have to have draconic lineage anymore, but if they do go this route it's been properly quantified. Again, what's with the freakin' wings at Level 14? Just because you've got a little dragon DNA in you why do you start turning into one a la Seth Brundle in The Fly? I assume stuff like this was left in to appease the half dozen people or so out there who actually liked the Fouth Edition. And before you start sending me pissed-off emails, I actually think Fourth was a good rule set, just not for D&D. Great for a super-hero game, yes, just not D&D. Of course, even crusty old grognards like me have to admit that "Draconic Presence" is actually pretty durned cool. Plus, I'm a huge sucker for random percentage die tables, so the "Surge" chart is pure money to me. 
• Then there's the Warlock / Witch. If you're having a hard time picturing this great new addition just think "dark priest in eternal servitude of some unnamable elder god". "Chain Pact" brings Familiars into the mix, "Blade Pact" is a bit too Green Lantern-ish for my taste and "Tome Pact" is toadly "METAL". The "Archfey" Patron sprinkles the Warlock with a dash of Druid, the "Fiend" Patron is also pretty durned "METAL" while the "Great Old One" Patron dares to invoke the name of Cthulhu himself. Which begs the questions: how many hours did the WOTC legal team pore over this to ensure that the Lovecraft estate wouldn't sue them into oblivion? Under this particular Patron, "Entropic Ward" is all "Nyah! Right back atcha!". By my estimation, a tiefling warlock with a Tome Pact and a Great Old One Patron is just about the "METAL-ist" PC in D&D history. And not only is "Eyes of the Rune Keeper" a pretty sweet power it could also be the title track of your character's debut album. 
• Copying Spells is now a clear and easy process for Wizards. Your Intelligence modifier plus Level equals the number of Spells you can prepare. The class features showcase an increasing familiarity with magic and they dovetail perfectly with the player's personal preference. The different schools of wizardry feel even more "Hogwart-y" than ever. "Portent" is fun as is "Instinctive Charm" and "Illusory Self". "Alter Memories" is basically a Jedi Mind Trick. "Sculpt Spells" could come in very handy while "Potent Cantrip" and "Overchannel" can give old Spells a new lease on life. Plus there's a ton of role-playing potential with things like "Illusory Reality". Since I've used Necromancer villains in my 3.5 campaign before, I'm delighted to see them properly represented as a formal school here. "Grim Harvest", "Undead Thralls" and "Command Undead" are all super sa-weet, with the latter ability in particular coming off as "Power Turning". With a clever player at the helm, Transmutation Wizards can use "Minor Alchemy" and "Master Transmuter" to become as powerful as Molecule Man from Marvel Comics, if not slightly more dorky. The Transmuter Stone could also have a lot of creative in-game applications.

Chapter 4: Personality and Background

• Gender has absolutely no impact on stats, as it should be. In a move that's also designed to enrage hordes of neck-bearded yahoos: your character's sexual orientation is entirely up to you. Simple, progressive and common sense. Pity it took so long to say it and double the pity that it had to be said at all in the first place.
• I actually like the specific examples taken directly from various D&D campaign settings like Forgotten Realms or Dragonlance. And why now show off a l'il swagga? It really drives home the rich history of the game and the examples are right on-point.
• Providing Dwarven and Elvish script is super-handy for DMs who want to come up with some cool-looking props, drawings, puzzles and whatnot.
• Personality Traits, Ideals, Bonds and Flaws really inspire newbies to role-play their characters. Inspiration finally gives players a palpable reward for portraying their characters as something less than "paragon".
• Backgrounds should've been in the game ages ago if only to account for a Character's initial skill set. They also provide great potential adventure hooks for the DM as well as awesome role-playing fodder. For example, the Hermit's "Discovery" Background is rife with potential. I sure wish that the "Sailor" background existed when I came up with my first character circa 1984. The "Dread Pirate Roberts" / "Bad Reputation" combo also looks like a real hoot.

Chapter 5: Equipment

• Not that I haven't always played it like that before, but I like how Electrum and Platinum pieces are officially considered rare and exotic now.
• A minimum Strength is required to avoid Heavy Armor movement penalties. Smart! Ergo, Rogues can wear Heavy Armor if they want to but Disadvantage and Dexterity caps will apply. The whole "no Dexterity bonus at all for Heavy Armor" kind of freaks me out a little bit even if it does make perfect sense.
• I really dig the "Finesse" attribute of rapiers and daggers.
• Advantage is such a simple and easy mechanic that it can be used to give tangible benefits to equipment like crowbars and magnifying glasses.
• Starting Equipment Packs = time-saving genius!
• I like how Tools are required to get your Proficiency Bonus. Stuff like this just makes the game feel more "real" to me. 
• Even though I tend to role-play stuff like this, Lifestyle Expenses are an easy, catch-all way to cover those pesky in-town costs of living. Just like so many other things in Fifth Edition, the designers took this as an opportunity to encourage role-playing!
• The "Trinket" chart is just about the greatest thing ever.

Chapter 6: Customization Options

• Multi-Classing is ludicrously easy to the point where determining available Spell Slots amongst two or three different Classes a super-simple.
• I live that Feats are now an optional branching path for character development and customization. The odd thing is that Feats like "Athlete" and "Actor" allow you to pick up one free Ability Score increase  plus get a free special ability. Seem a tad O.P. to me, but, frankly I'm glad the system has imbalances. This gives veteran dungeon crawlers a chance to play challenging characters while noobies can min / max up the perfect meat shield.
• A wily player might be pretty dangerous while armed with the "Keen Mind" Feat.

Chapter 7: Using Ability Scores

• Did I mention that the Advantage / Disadvantage system is awesome? 'Cuz the Advantage / Disadvantage system really is awesome.
• I just realized that the art isn't exactly plentiful in the Players Handbook but what there is of it is head and shoulders over previous iterations of the game, particularly the Second Edition.  *shudder*
• Ability Checks use a Difficulty Class which mirrors 3 / 3.5. This is good.
• Basing Saving Throws on the six different abilities make sense but I'm thinking that Charisma saves are gonna be pretty rare.
• Under "Lifting and Carrying" the Encumbrance rules are refreshingly simple

Chapter 8: Adventuring

• Time, movement and environmental effects are easy and intuitive. As a side note, it's kind of amusing for me to see the two styles of role-playing finally quantified as either "descriptive" or "active" for the very first time ever. Like sloped floors in movie theaters why wasn't this done ages ago?
• "Rest". *Ugh*  Of everything in Fifth Edition this is what I like the least. It still feels like re-heated leftovers from Fourth Edition's sad attempt to ape World of Warcraft. I'm sure my opinion of this will continue to evolve as I keep playing but right now I think it's ridiculous. Sure, you aren't getting max Hit Dice back every time you take a Short Rest and you have to burn an hour to do it, but the idea of getting all of your freakin' Hit Points back after an eight hour nap is completely ludicrous to me. Again, it makes the characters feel super-heroic and it also devalues the Cleric as a clutch member of the group.
• I really dig the ease and practicality of the Downtime Activities. Crafting items now feels do-able, you can work to make money, recuperate from a disease or an injury, do some Gandalf-style research, try to learn a new language or become Proficient with a set of Tools.

Chapter 9: Combat

• It's no co-incidence that the D&D Encounters program started during Fourth Edition since a single tilt  in that version could easily take up an entire session. Mercifully things are back to being super-streamlined in the Fifth Edition. How's this for a Surprise-determining no-brainer: "If neither side tries to be stealthy they automatically notice each other". Well, d'uh...why didn't we just put it that way sooner?!? Initiative is essentially 3 / 3.5. This is also good. Miniatures are not required but I'm still rockin' 'em 'cuz I like the tactical aspects of the game. Attacks of Opportunity are still a thing but can be offset with a Disengage Action. You can also Help an Ally gang up on an enemy to achieve a Combat Advantage. "Ready Actions" are also clearly defined.
• Diagonal Movement counted as a single space is total horseshite so I'm still using 3.5's movement costs. I haven't gotten there yet by I presume that the exact same rule is floated somewhere in the Fifth Edition DMG.
• Full Actions in battle are clear cut. You can either Attack, Cast a Spell, Dash (I.E. double move), Disengage, Dodge (impose Disadvantage on your attackers), Help someone gain Advantage on a task or while fighting someone, Hide, Ready an Action, Search or Activate an Object. Easy peasy.
• Grappling is soooooo much simpler now. To the point where I'm tempted to create a wrasslin' Monk just for shits and / or giggles. How cool would that be?!?

Chapter 10: Spellcasting

• Spell Slots work frightening well. I like the idea of expending a higher level Spell Slot to beef up lower level Spells.
• As before, Cantrips can be cast an unlimited number of times, keeping magic-users in the game long after their Spell Slots have been exhausted. Side note: casting spells as a Ritual takes longer but it doesn't expel a Spell Slot.
• Back in the day, if a magic-user took any damage at all, their Spell was instantly borked. Now they can Save versus Constitution to complete the spell, the base Difficultly Class being 10 or half the damage you take, whatever is higher. Nice touch.
• The Difficulty Classes to avoid Spells is 8 + the spell caster's Ability Modifier + their Proficiency Bonus + any temporary bonuses. The relevant Ability Modifiers remain the same with Wisdom for Clerics and Druids, Charisma for Sorcerer and Intelligence for Wizards. The new kids on the block, the Warlocks, use Charisma like a Sorcerer. 

Chapter 11: Spells

• Spell descriptions are more brief, economic and to the point than they've ever been before, which is awesome. Oddly this hadn't led to very many Spell effect debates, but then again I don't play the game with anal-retentive rules lawyers. 
• Many Spells like "Alter Self" or "Hallow" have multiple applications. Others scale in power according to Level like "Acid Splash" or they can be beefed up with higher level Spell Slots like "Arms of Hador". This sort of fluidity will keep veteran spell-slingers amused for years.
• Simple and elegant rules easily govern once-complicated Spell effects. For example using five different size classes for "Animate Objects" or using an invisible "sensor" to define the awareness of "Clairvoyance". Many of the Spells, particularly the new ones, just seem like a ton of fun. "Awaken", "Curse", "Bigby's Hand", "Calm Emotions", "Contingency", "Compel Duel" and "Glibness" are just a few of the Spells that are rife with dramatic potential. On the other hand, some, like "Banishing Smite" seem a tad overpowered. Conversely, "Enlarge / Reduce" looks sorta Nerfed if only due to the Spell level it was assigned to. And to be filed under the "WTF?!?" category...why does "Fire Shield" produce a cold affect?
• Using Hit Points versus Hit Dice to determine how many creatures are affected by spells like "Color Spray" is a very simple way to determine whether or bigger or higher level creatures are affected.
• Thanks to the Necromancer school, the "ick"-factor has really been cranked up with "Contagion" and "Harm". Spells like "Eyebite" also have a lot of creatively sadistic applications. And, hey, "Finger of Death" gives you a free zombie buddy!
• I like how the Advantage / Disadvantage system has actually inspired new spells such as "Enhanced Ability".
• The whole "cast a spell on the same spot for year and it'll be permanent" thing is pretty bizarre. I mean, how boring is your D&D campaign if you actually manage to pull this off? 
• Petrification as per "Flesh To Stone" or the Indigo effect in "Prismatic Spray" use the same "three strikes and yer out" Dying mechanic, which gives you a fighting chance to dramatically power your way out of the effect. Cool!
• Spells that impact specific stats like "Ray of Enfeeblement" simplify things by imposing relevant mechanics instead of reducing the Ability Score itself. This is a lot easier then temporarily lowering your actual Strength or Constitution number and then putting the game on hold in order to figure out your reduced modifiers.    

Appendix A: Conditions

•  Once again, the Advantage / Disadvantage mechanic comes to the rescue and simplifies so many of these things, some of which used to require multiple paragraphs of text. Now many of them have been boiled down to a few bullet points. Here's a great example for "Prone": "an attack roll against the creature has advantage if the attacker is within 5 feet. Otherwise the attack roll has Disadvantage." Perfect.
• The charming little sketches that illustrate each Condition amuse the crap outta me.
• Curiously enough, you can't just hit Paralyzed targets automatically, but you do get Advantage and score a crit if you hit them. Makes sense. Sort of.
• The six Levels of Exhaustion is elegant and intuitive. 

Appendix B: Gods of the Multiverse

• Too lazy to create a pantheon of your own? No worries, this section of the Players Handbook has got ya covered. If you just need a cool-sounding name of a trickery god just pick the one that sounds the coolest. Examples of Alignment, Suggested Domains and the god's Symbol might even inspire new DM's to craft their own deities. 
• The radically different examples of pre-existing D&D pantheons might convince veteran DM's to think outside the box when it comes to inventing their own campaign religions.
• Since (A) the only campaign settings that existed back when I first started playing D&D were Greyhawk and Dragonlance and (B) we were too cheap to buy anything other than the core books and (C) we were too lazy to create our own pantheons, we started out by using the Greek and Norse gods. Knowing how integral the Deities & Demigods / Legends & Lore hardbacks were to DM's of yore, the designers provide economic little summaries of the Celtic, Greek, Egyptian and Norse pantheons. Like everything else in the Players Handbook, the descriptions are brief, concise and surprisingly well-written. 

Appendix C:  The Planes of Existence  

• The new Planes of Existence diagram is a helluva lot slicker than the one I first laid eyes on in the AD&D Players Handbook! The names of some of the Planes have been altered, presumably to steer sensitive souls away from real-world belief systems. That's sort of a shame if that's the case since  "Nirvana" and the "Happy Hunting Grounds" are both considerably more evocative and appealing than the generic descriptors of "Mechanus" and "The Beastlands". *yawn* 
• The Feywild and the Shadowfell are relatively new concepts to me and the descriptions tease economic and evocative details that makes you want to learn more about them.
• Honestly, these realms are just as challenging to wrap your head around as any modern religious ethos or existential belief system. Everything makes an odd sort of sense, that is until the Sigil and the Outlands are mentioned, which comes across as the ramblings of friend of yours who's waaaaay too high right now. Conversely the scant details about the Far Realm feel like a mandatory high-level adventure hook.  

Appendix D: Creature Statistics

• Short, sweet and right to the point...this is how you do monster stat blocks properly!

Appendix E: Inspiration Reading

• Words can't describe how delighted I am to see Gary Gygax's original "Inspirational Reading" list back and, better yet, expanded to include modern genre classics such as George R.R. Martin's "Song of Ice and Fire" series. Even if it succeeds in showing just a handful of kids that this fantasy stuff didn't just start with World of Warcraft this page has done an admirable thing. If it turns them into avid readers, so much the better.

***

In summary, I'm really enjoying this latest version of D&D. In many ways it feels like a "greatest hits" package, combining the simplicity of the Rules Cyclopedia, the thematic chrome of AD&D and the relatively-grounded tone of 3 / 3.5.

Right now I'm running two campaigns: an original setting 3 / 3.5 game (with waaaay too many players) and a 5'th Edition game using the "Lost Mines of Phandelver" to test-drive the system. Even though I'm having a blast with the module I'm also hesitant to migrate my original campaign over to 5'th mainly because it's just so durned easy for me to Google any random question and D&D Wiki will answer it for me.

Which begs the question: how badly is WOTC still kicking themselves over the whole Open Gaming License idea? After all, Paizo lured a major chunk of players away with Pathfinder (I.E. D&D 3.75) and if not for the lingering online support for earlier editions we'd probably all be drinking Fifth Edition-brand Kool Aid right now.

Having said that, the failure of Forth Edition, the competition of Pathfinder and the rise of the OSR movement certainly forced the designers to brainstorm a new, innovative and user-friendly version of the game in a sincere bid to lure lapsed players back into the fold. And I think they succeeded in this quite admirably. I can personally attest that twenty-somethings are playing this version of the game in droves, and for many of them it's their first experience with D&D ever. I can't think of a higher testimony than that.

One major reason for this is how approachable the rules are. For example, thirty-five distinctly different Skills in 3 / 3.5 really baffled new players. Fifth Edition reduced this number to around eighteen and it's all the richer for it.  At this stage I really don't need a specific rule to govern every single contingency. I'd rather just pick a Skill, make up a DC on the spot and get players to roll for it. Or just role-play it out if I think that'll be more fun. As long as neophyte DM's don't let their players bog the game down into an unending stream of d20 rolls, you should be alright.

But perhaps the most important thing to note is just how much fun this version is to read. Lead designers Mike Mearls and Jeremy Crawford have given us a compulsively-readable tome that falls somewhere between the florid yet evocative prose of Gary Gygax and the precise rulespeak of Monte Cook and company.

All told, I give the Dungeons & Dragons Fifth Edition Players Handbook five pips outta six with a healthy tilt up towards Elysium!

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